Sunday, June 13, 2010

Lately I've been doing shots that are very present--meaning spur-of-the-moment and not planned out. I keep a small arsenal of my cameras in my car so that, if a moment arises, I can just whip any of them out and snap something quick. I love this kind of shooting because every roll so far has a variety of different shots that range from kind of artsy and abstract to street-style. But with this kind of shooting, I almost feel careless; like my subjects aren't very meaningful and they just fall into my lap by chance. I want to start a phocumentary series involving complete strangers, but capturing them in such a way that you can almost see into their soul through their eyes. This would be a somewhat long-term look and well thought out series of photographs that will mean something to me personally, as well as draw out the individuals being photographed.
I've been thinking a lot about stereotypes that people automatically and instinctively place on others based on their first impressions and how the person on the recieving end reacts to these labels. I myself have been labeled by others based solely on my characteristics or how I look or act around everyone. One such label "category" (so to speak) I've experienced on an intimate level was my sexuality. Before about a year ago, I never thought twice about my sexuality. In fact, I don't think I even considered calling it anything because I'd only had one boyfriend (who I broke up with for various reasons) before that year of sexual exploration. I met this young woman who I fell in love with and had a deep devotion to for a while. I was fine with this, I didn't really care about calling it anything, but after meeting new people who asked me whether I was a lesbian or bi or straight, I was at a loss as to what I should call myself. I was so shocked that I had to label myself that I was totally confused. I was never asked by others to put myself into a sexual cubby before...I was just me. After a lot of soul-searching over this past year, I've slowly been accepting this new identity, a new label, of lesbian. I resisted the label of lesbian for such a long time because I believe in being an individual and that I shouldn't have to label myself just so people can put me in their tidy little love archives as lesbian. Just recently, I've been realizing that I can still be an individual while also being labeled as a member of a particular sexual orientation label.
I think this kind of experience is quite common for some people, but we all have had different experiences. Some individuals have accepted certain labels because they feel comfortable in that skin, while others reject labels because they don't fit them at all. It would be interesting to kind of interview volunteers on their experiences with being labeled and whether they've accepted them or not. I then want to capture them in their true light, their true selves, regardless (or in support) of their label. I don't want this to be in a studio kind of setting. I want to be out there, in the real world, with a clean and diffused light illuminating them evenly. A white backdrop would be nice, maybe a white-washed wall or brick maybe. I know that may be too much to ask with the location, but that's what I'd want ideally.
I also want to cover a wide subject base; have multiple ethnicities, ages, sexes, sexual orientations, and walks-of-life represented. I believe diversity and understanding of all people is important, to never be narrow-minded when exploring or surveying an idea.
There are other elements that will go into this project, but I kind of want them to be secret for the sake of possessing my own idea and not having others use it exactly (I'm fine with the exchange of overall ideas...that's bound to happen in art, but exact copying is not really cool when a project is still in its developing stages).
Anyway, I want to at least start this project this summer. I plan on scoping out possible locations in Philly where people aren't really rushing everywhere and see if I can get my feet wet. Hopefully, all will go well and what's in my head will come out in print.

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